


Mercy

by Starofwinter



Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Clone Medics, Euthanasia, Gen, Medical Trauma, POV Second Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-26
Updated: 2017-08-26
Packaged: 2018-12-20 06:07:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11914788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starofwinter/pseuds/Starofwinter
Summary: Mercy doesn't always mean saving everyone.





	Mercy

**Author's Note:**

> Semi-sequel to [Medic.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/11049945)

You earned your name today, you think.   _ Killer _ .  You killed  _ brothers _ .  They would have died anyway, you tell yourself, slower, more painful, alone…  You were making it easier, faster, giving them a hand to hold and someone to talk to.  But you know the truth.  Your hand was on the hypo, it was  _ you _ who made the decision on when they should march away.

_ You did the best you could _ .  You know that.  You save as many as you can, but it’s not enough.  It’s never enough.

_ You can’t save everyone. _  You know that too.  The kind of injuries brought by the weapons both sides wield don’t always kill quickly.  Sometimes they maim, sometimes death comes slowly, on creeping dark wings, sometimes by the merciful hand of a brother.  Sometimes it comes by your hand.

_ Be merciful, even when mercy means ending their suffering _ .  You remember the day Kix told you that, when you were holding down a screaming brother, his body burnt, armor melted into slag on his skin, begging for someone, anyone to make it stop.  Kix had given him the injection and held his miraculously uninjured hand, talking in gentle tones until he went quiet and the light faded from his eyes.  He’d squeezed your shoulder and given you the quiet instruction, and you’d thought you understood.  At least, until it was your turn to hold someone’s hand and give them that same peace.  It was the hardest thing you’d ever done, and it still is.

_ That’s what makes you a good medic _ , they say, when all the medics are gathered in a quiet corner of the medbay, sharing drinks from hidden flasks, a silent sort of understanding between all of you,  _ the day you don’t care when you have to help someone march on is the day you become no better than the  _ Kaminiise.  

Somehow, knowing all of that doesn’t help.


End file.
